Why Me?
by Oswin Reid
Summary: C'mon! I finally get a role in a movie, but find out I need severe martial arts training. Then I'm told I have less than a year to do so! Not only that, but I find 10 abandoned puppies. Why me?
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone! I've read a few of these in the past few days, and I just couldn't help myself. Reviews are love! Every review, Itachi will take his shirt off. Guaranteed!**

***Sharingan eyes glare at me through the darkness***

**Ah-em, okay... maybe not. *gulps* I could always get Hidan to sacrifice those who don't... **

**Hidan: YES! Bitch, give me the names!**

***Pulls out Flamethrower* Die heathen! *Hidan quickly burns to a crisp***

**Deidara: No! He's supposed to explode, yeah. You're doing it wrong.**

***Turns to Blonde Bomber with a maniac look in my eye* You say something?**

**Deidara: *gulps* No...**

**Right answer! Oh! Danna, do the disclaimer!**

**Sasori: ... No.**

***Eyes glint dangerously as eyebrow twitches* Danna... is it true you're made of wood? *Readies Flamethrower***

**Sasori: *Sweatdrops* Oswin does not own Naruto, or the Akatsuki, or any other movies/anime/TV shows mentioned. That being said, any attempts to plagiarise or copy her work without permission from Oswin herself, will be rewarded with death. If these terms are not acceptable, ... *Glances down at the thick stack of paper titled 'Rules and Regulations: Disclaimer' in disbelief* Do I have to read all this?**

***Sighs* Fine. Anyway, now that you get the point, on with the prologue! **

**P.S. Pictures of the Akatsuki as puppies and Gray Caverly on my profile.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Hi. I'm Gray. Yes, I know, how unusual. My Mom's name was Ruby Black. I shit you not. My baby sisters are Ebony, Amber, Sapphire and Violet. My older brother was called Cyan. Yes, Cyan. Are you sensing the theme yet? I think I've got the better name out of all of us. My Dad was Jasper Caverly. He met my Mom when he was writing a manuscript. He stopped writing so he could settle down with her. He then got into the publishing business. Yeah, real big career change. My Mom was an aspiring actress. She was the one who taught us how to lie through our teeth so we wouldn't get punished. Sadly, they're both dead. Terrorist attack on the hotel they were staying at in Germany. I miss them, but it's not so bad. I inherited the big house out in the middle of nearly nowhere, and a small amount of the inheritance. My sisters Ebony and Amber were killed in a drunk driving incident in Peru; Cyan overdosed on opium and died not shortly after. Violet couldn't take it anymore and tried committing suicide at least five times. She succeeded on her sixth. She died by hanging herself. All my other relatives are either dead or living in Europe. I'm all alone. And it's perfect. Yeah, I miss them all at times, but I can't change what's already happened. Unfortunately for me, my little haven was going to be disrupted very soon. And all hell was going to break loose.

Like my parents, I had an unhealthy interest in things imaginary ever since I was a child. So, I followed in their footsteps. I managed to secure a job at three big publishing companies proofreading other people's manuscripts and stories in the comfort of my own home. I also have a small acting career. When I say small I mean small. I finally got a break, and was called in to audition for a trilogy about a warrior who was outcast because she was female. She then strives to save the people who abandoned her and left her for dead from the invading evil. I, miraculously, got the lead. I still need to learn martial arts and bulk up slightly in a year, and then filming starts. So, every two days, a professional trainer comes by my house and takes me to train for about three hours. Every other alternate day, a martial artist comes by my house and teaches me for about five hours. I can feel your muscles wincing in sympathy. Good.

Anyways, I usually got the weekends off, and I have to practice on my own. I have a habit of going into town those days, to the park usually. I just sit at the playground and watch the kids. Today, however, there was a light drizzle, so the place was abandoned. I approached my usual park bench, and turned my face up to the sky. Rain doesn't bother me like most people. When everyone was still alive, we used to go and play tag when it rained. It brings me closer to my family. To me, it signifies cleansing, a fresh start. Little did I know I was going to take those words to a whole new level.

I heard a man grunting, and shuffling nearby. I open my eyes, glancing across the grounds until I spot the source of the noise. A burly looking man carrying a damp cardboard box. I narrowed my eyes as he threw it into the woods. As soon as it hit the ground, a sharp yelp split the air. My eyes widened and I shot up, running over to the box as the man ran back to his truck. I dashed over to the now misshapen cardboard structure, praying that the creature inside wasn't hurt badly. I tore it open, and stared down at ten shivering little bundles of fur. My heart went out to them, and I sighed, knowing I wouldn't be able to give them up. "Don't worry, darlings," I soothed. "You're safe now." I close the box, and pick it up slowly, groaning at the strain it put on my muscles. I started walking to my beat up Plymouth Acclaim. I accidentally jostled the box as I reached for my keys. A whimper sounded from the confines of the now soggy cardboard. "Sorry, babies. You'll be warm soon. I promise." I murmured.

I unlocked the faded red car, and gently set the box on the passenger's seat. I quickly ran around to the driver's side, and started the car. I immediately turned on the heat, and started heading for home. I opened the box so they would dry slightly faster. "That bastard won't ever hurt you again," I uttered, knuckles turning white from gripping the steering wheel. "I promise."

* * *

I drive up my driveway through the now pouring rain, anxious to get the little guys inside. I park under my 'garage', which is really just a slab of pavement with my deck as a roof. I shoot out of the car, jogging to the passenger's door to grab the box and its precious cargo. I lift them carefully, grinding my teeth when I feel a muscle in my back start to spasm. "Dammit," I hissed through clenched teeth, shoulders starting to shake from the strain. I slam the car door shut with my foot, and march as quickly as I can to the front door. I manage (somehow) to unlock and open the wooden door all while supporting the box. I slide inside, closing the door behind me.

I shuffle the box a bit in my arms, walking into my living room. I set the box down on the floor , and run to go grab some towels for the poor little thing. Unbeknownst to me, those same poor little things were S-Rank criminals.

* * *

The noise was enough to make the great and fearless leader go mad._ Enough!_ He shouts at the sniveling and squabbling members. Of course, they immediately fall silent. _Does anyone remember anything?_ Pein asks calmly. A collective, _No_, echoes throughout the soaked through cardboard. Pein turns to the only still bundle of fur. _W__ell, then, we might as well distinguish who everyone is_. He murmurs. _Konan! _He calls out. A soft yip answers him as he turns to the pup next to him. _H__ere, Pein-sama. _He nods, memorizing her new appearance. _Itachi! _The only one not shivering nodded his furry head at the pup in charge. _Kisame!_ One of the bigger puppies grinned, showing all of his teeth. _Leader-sama._ Pein shakes his head in acknowledgement. _Kakuzu._ A bark answered him. And the list went on until he came to Tobi. A new voice came from a pup that seemed familiar. _Leader-sama, I am here as well. _Pein's head swiveled to regard the other puppy, disbelief etched on his canine face. _Sasori? _And then they were all taken out one by one.

* * *

"You poor dears," I murmur, wrapping the shivering puppies in nice warm fluffy towels. I sigh, trying to let go of my anger. They all looked at me with questioning eyes. "Don't worry, I'll be taking care of you guys instead of that dickhead." I spat, rage boiling over. I rub my eyes, suddenly tired. "I'm dead on my feet it seems," I mumble, weariness settling over like a blanket. "Don't be afraid to cuddle," I laugh as I let the rest of my body fall to the floor. "Wake me up at your own peril." The puppies cold little bodies crawl in next to me as I fall prey to slumber.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, lovelies! Thank you to CrazyTomboy679 and Naruto-FairyTail-1710 for reviewing! And to those of you who have followed and favorite, you have earned the chance to hug Sasori no Danna!**

**Sasori: No.**

***glares* Remember who has control over the story? I can make you transform into a homosexual who likes wearing pink and sparkles.**

**Sasori: ... Fine.**

**Yay! Thank you Danna! *glomps Sasori***

**Sasori: Get off brat.**

**You know, I still have that Flamethrower...**

**Sasori: ... *hugs me back* Love you, brat!**

***ruffles Sasori's hair* Good Danna...**

**Anyway, Obito, do the disclaimer! *All the Akatsuki: Who's Obito?***

**Tobi: Alright, Oswin-chan! Oswin-chan does not own Tobi or Deidara-sempai or Pein-sama or Konan-chan or Hidan-baka or...**

**Hidan: You little shit! *chases Tobi with scythe* **

**Tobi: *hiding behind Oswin* Don't forget to review for Oswin-chan! *Dark voice* Or I will find you and... *chuckles***

**Tobi is a good boy! *whispers* There's some chocolate under my pillow.**

**Tobi: Thank you Oswin-chan! AAHHH! *runs away from Hidan***

***smiles brightly* Don't forget to review!**

* * *

My eyes blink open blearily, only to see nothing but white. My eyebrows furrow. What the... ? Oh. Right. I sit up slowly, wincing as a twinge travels through my abdominals. My hand brushes over something soft. I look down, noticing the black fur pressed against my side. I smile softly, glancing around me. Ten little balls of fluff surrounded me, keeping me warm throughout the night. I somehow manage to get up without disturbing any of the piles of adorableness.

I stand up, stretching my still sore muscles. A yawn escapes me as I ruffle my hair and head towards my kitchen, stomach growling. I pad across the tile flooring, opening my fridge. I stared at the empty shelves, not really comprehending that all I had to eat was a two-week old carton of Chinese food. I grabbed it, setting it on the counter. Food is food. I'll have to call the grocery store and have my stuff delivered early. See, I'm kinda seen as a bad omen in the superstitious town nearby. And that town has the only grocery store close to my house. So, I have a deal with the owners. If I don't come in, they'll deliver everything I need to my door. It's pretty convenient. Just yet another reason for me not to leave the house.

I snag a fork from the counter and open the carton, sniffing the contents to make sure it was still partially edible. I then shrugged, not smelling any mold, and stabbed a chicken ball. Mind you, I'm not even sure if mold has a smell. I stuff my face, beef fried rice falling onto the floor. I hear nails clicking across the tiles. I look down to see a little grey puppy looking up at me, giving me a sad little whine. I 'aww', and crouch down, scratching behind their ears. "Now that right there, ladies and gents, was the ultimate definition of the puppy dog eyes," I announce to the others standing right behind the blue-grey pup. They all glance at each other, which makes me tilt my head in slight confusion. It seems like they can understand every word that comes out of my mouth. Odd.

I pick up the phone, dialing the number of my delivery boy. I heard him pick up. "Hey, Gray! What do you need?" I plop down on my floor, a small smile on my face. "I need ten dog collars, some leashes, a lot of dog food, some brushes and..." I'm interrupted before I can finish. "Yeah, I get the point, Gray. You want your usual order too?" I smile sheepishly, scratching my head. "Please?" I heard Johnny sigh exasperatedly. "I'll double the ramen, if you want. No charge." My smile brightened. "You. Are. The best! Thanks, Johnny!" I heard him chuckle on the other end. "No problem. It'll be at your house in two hours. I'll see you then Gray." I replied, "Jaa ne!" and hung up.

I sighed, looking at the dogs. "Well, that's one problem taken care of. Now, you need names." I took a whiff, gagging. "And baths." I got off the floor and headed back into the living room to tickle my creative genius. I heard more whines as they followed me. I sigh, looking down at them. "I'm sorry, guys, but I don't have any food. Just wait a few more hours, ne? Then we all can eat." I sat down, leaning against the couch. "Now, names. Who's first?" The black curly haired puppy approached me, tail wagging. I stroke his head, giggling as he nearly purrs. "Well, then aren't you a sweet little thing? Just like a candy bar..." I snapped my fingers. "You shall be Snickers. Next... you." I point at the obvious Alpha in the group. "You are dubbed Chief. I trust you to look after the idiots while I'm not here." I swear he nodded at me. The only terrier trotted up to me next, a doggie grin on his face. I frowned, ruffling my finger s through his coat. "You almost look blue. I guess that's your name. Blue. Nice and simple, eh?" I gestured towards the other black puppy, "Your friend is Ash. And the blonde is Sparky. You, on the other hand," I pointed to the only female in the group, "are Angel. Because you are obviously perfect compared to the rest of these dumbos." I giggled as most of them barked and whined at that comment. "Us girls have to stick together. Now, you shall be Oreo, because I can't come up with anything else," I said, waving at the Border Collie, which is one of the only breeds I recognize. "The white one shall be Butch, because he is anything but," I swear I heard some of them snicker at that, "And you shall be Red. For obvious reasons." At this they deadpanned. I leapt to my feet, clapping my hands. "Now it's bath time!" And with that, they all scattered.


End file.
